Queenie Boy Home Inspection Checklist

For the past few weeks I've been looking for a condo. Yesterday I was hobnobbing with two real estate agents and a home inspector, talking about fascinating subjects like water heaters, oil tanks, electrical circuit breakers, baseboards, insulation, drywall, & foundation cracks.

My inner gay boy struggled to keep alert & gather in information.

Obviously my interests lie more in aesthetics, rather than the practical.
That got me thinking.... In my view, counter to the burly man home inspection, there should be a queenie boy home inspection required. The queenie boy home inspection would note all the concerns that the He-man is oblivious to. All prospective buyers would heed to the code of fabulousness.

Queenie Boy’s Home Inspection Checklist
Kitchen countertop spacious enough to make mojitos	+
1980’s light fixtures		----- Argh!!
Living room big enough for small dancing/workout space	+
spacious tool shed		------Huh?
Deck for entertaining	+
View of hot guy next door, thru pantry window	+
Beige, neutral colors on walls		-----Yuck!!!!
jacuzzi	+
Closets with extra room for shoes	+
Flower beds in windows	+
Wallpaper in bd. with bucolic scene		----
Orange rug in hallway		-----
4 deeded parking spaces	+
China closet to display paperweight collection	+
Wall space for Mapplethorpe prints	+